What has Your PM done in One Year

‘So, what has YOUR PM Modi done in a year, apart from going on foreign trips’? Asked the ageing adarshliberal diva, trying to arch her heavily botoxed eyebrows.

‘For one thing, Modi is not just MY PM, he is the democratically elected PM of India, with a massive mandate.’

‘Yeah, yeah, whatever, but he is not sexy’, she pouted.

‘Being sexy is not the PM’s job Ma’am, for that you have Raghuram Rajan’.

The diva blushed, as much as her cheek implants would allow her to.

'Let us not talk about Raghu here, tell me what has Modi done’?'

‘Have you been to a train station lately? Oh, I am sorry, you don’t travel by train like us lesser mortals. But I have, and all the train stations that I have been to have never looked cleaner.’

‘Oh, you mean that Swachch Bharat thing, oh, that’s just a gimmick’, she shrugged.

‘Well, according to news reports over 31 lakh new toilets have been built in rural India under Swachch Bharat’.

‘That doesn’t impress me honey, tell me what has Modi done for people’?

‘Fine, let me give you real life examples. My domestic help has opened a bank account for the very first time in her life under the Jan Dhan Yojana. She gets her salary credited into her account every month. For the first time, she has complete control over her own money. Her alcoholic husband has no access to it. She has managed to save more money in this year than she has in the last ten years’.

‘Pooh, that’s one person’.

‘Okay, take the case of my driver. He has invested in the Beti Bachao Beti Padhao scheme for his daughter’s future. He has also enrolled for the Jan Suraksha Yojana. He says, I feel a lot more reassured now that I have some insurance cover. My tailor has applied for a loan under the Mudra Bank and she is awaiting disbursement. So far amounts of over 29,000 Crores have been disbursed to small entrepreneurs in collateral-free loans. These are people I know personally, whose life has changed for the better.'

‘Drivers, maids, tailors, is that all you can think of? Tell me what Modi has done for people like ‘us’?

‘Have you heard of ‘Make in India? After the launch of the program, India emerged as top destination for FDI surpassing China and the US.’

‘Oh, how does that matter to me? I want the freedom to eat beef. All your Modi has done is to ban beef!’, Simpered the adarshliberal while sipping delicately on sparkled Evian water.

‘I am really sorry that you feel that way, but ‘Modi’ hasn’t banned beef, the state govt. has, and BTW, weren’t you the one who were asking people to be ‘kind to stray dogs’ in your locality?’

‘Yeah, I am an animal lover, you know that’, she drawled.

‘And cows are not animals’?

She ignored my question.

'Have you surrendered your gas subsidy? I have and so have hundreds of people that I know personally.’

‘Oh, you Bhakts,’ she drawled in her faux Colaba meets Chicago accent as she signalled her servant to clear the table. He took the barely touched glass of water and the half-empty bottle of Evian away.

‘Have you heard of ‘Jalyukt Shivar’? The flagship program of the Maharashtra government to encourage water conservation’? I asked. I could see her massive swimming pool rippling in the sun outside from where I was sitting.

‘Not really. I have no time for all this sarkari stuff dahling, and now if you’ll excuse me, I have to leave now. I am launching my new book, ‘How to be sexy at sixty by eating beef’.

-Shefali Vaidya

Karma is a Bitch !!!

I am just Joking !!!

Indians Concept !!!

Story of the Weekends !!!

Who is Maria Sharapova?

How many of us have heard of Richie McKaw or Quade Cooper? You haven't? Well, they are two of probably the greatest Rugby players ever. Are you an evil person for not knowing them?

Again, wait - quickly - who is the captain of the Indian Men's Hockey Team? You dont know? Are you an evil person for not knowing him? Are you being disrespectful to him and the hockey team? Or is it just because hockey is a sport you don't follow?

The Logical Indian denounces the act of Indians trolling Maria Sharapova's Facebook profile, inundating it with profanity. Think people, think! Would Sachin ever want us to indulge in profanity on his behalf? Are we not indulging in behaviour that he would find extremely embarassing?

While Cricket is a popular sport in a handful of commonwealth countries, we must realise that it is unknown to most other countries.

There is no doubt that Sachin Tendulkar is the greatest cricketer to have walked the earth, and a living sporting legend. But why should a tennis player from Russia - a non cricket playing country be expected to know about Sachin?

Please note that she only commented that she has not heard of Sachin Tendulkar. Ask any American, and they would answer the same. Ask any Colombian, Argentinian, Urugyayan, Mexican, Tongan, Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese or people from hundreds of countries, they might reply the same.

This is not in any way a disrespect to Sachin. Its just that Cricket is not a sport they follow.

Please, let us all be Logical, friends! A little bit of sportsman spirit maybe?
If you agree, please, share the logic!

Jai Hind!

Check Your Presence of Mind

Check ur presence of mind. Take the test. Relax, clear your mind and begin. What's the 1st answer that comes to ur mind?

1. What do you put in a toaster?

Answer: "Bread." If you said "toast," give up now and do something else.. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said bread, go to Question 2.

2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," don't attempt the next question.
Your brain is over -stressed and may even overheat. Content yourself by reading more appropriate literature such as Auto World. However, if you said "water", proceed to question 3.

3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks," why the hell are you still reading these?? If you said "glass," go on to Question 4.

4. It's twenty years ago, and a plane crashes from 20,000 feet over Germany (If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into East and West Germany) Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany, West Germany, "no man's land"?

Answer: You don't bury survivors!!! If you said ANYTHING else, you must stop. If you said, "You don't bury survivors", proceed to the next question.

5. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from Mumbai to Pune. In Mumbai , 17 people get on, in Pune , 16 get off. Name the driver.

Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember your own name? It was YOU!!

6. Try it seriously dont cheat its amazing. A MUST TRY!!!!!!! ALZHEIMERS' EYE. Count every " F " in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTI
FIC STUDY COMBINED WITH
THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS... 
(SEE BELOW)

HOW MANY ? 

3....4.... WRONG, THERE ARE 6.
The reasoning : The brain cannot process "OF". Incredible or what? Go back and look again!! Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is a genius. Three is normal, four is quite rare

Setting up a New Password

Thinking Outside of the Box

(Note: I don't know how true this is and whether it actually happened in real, but it makes a interesting read)

These are few questions asked in an interview! The answers are really stunning and inspiring.

Question 1:

You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, it’s raining heavily, when suddenly you pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for a bus:

1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
2. An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.

Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing very well that there could only be one passenger in your car?

This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.

He simply answered:
I would give the car keys to my Old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams.

Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to Think Outside of the Box.?

Question 2:

What will you do if I run away with your sister?

The candidate who was selected answered, “I will not get a better match for my sister than you sir”

Question 3:

Interviewer (to a student girl candidate) : What if one morning you woke up & found that you were pregnant.

Girl – I will be very excited and take an off, to celebrate with my husband.

Normally an unmarried girl will be shocked to hear this, but she managed it well. Why I should think it in the wrong way, she said later when asked.

Question 4:

Interviewer: He ordered a cup of coffee for the candidate. Coffee arrived kept before the candidate, then he asked what is before you?

Candidate: Instantly replied: “Tea”

He got selected.

You know how and why did he say TEA, when he knows very well that coffee was kept before.
(Answer: The question was What is before you (U, alphabet) Reply was TEA ( T, alphabet).
Alphabet T is before Alphabet U.

Question5;

Interviewer said: “I shall either ask you ten easy questions or one really difficult question.”

Think well before you make up your mind! The boy thought for a while and said, my choice is one really difficult question.?

Well, good luck to you, you have made your own choice!

Now tell me this. What comes first, Day or Night?

The boy was jolted into reality as his admission depends on the correctness of his answer, but he thought for a while and said, “It’s the DAY sir!?”

How? the interviewer asked.

Sorry sir, you promised me that you will not ask me a SECOND difficult question!?

Sometimes just thinking out of the box is all it takes!
Share with your friend and give them a special moment of thinking…!!

The New Samsung Galaxy

The SeaSide Story

The Obedient Wife

There was a man, who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money.
He was a real miser when it came to his money.

Just before he died, he said to his wife...
'When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me.

I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.'

And so he got his wife to promise him, with all of her heart.
He died soon.

He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there,dressed in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.

When they finished the ceremony, and just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket.

The obdient wife said,
 'Wait just a moment!'

She had a small metal box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down and they rolled it away.

 Then her friend said,

 'Girl, I know you were not foolish
 enough to put all that money in there with your husband.'

 The loyal wife replied,
 'Listen, I'm a wife; I cannot go back on my word. I promised him.'

'You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!?!?!?'

'I sure did,' said the loyal wife.

'I got all the money  together, put it into my account, and wrote him a cheque.... I put the cheque in the casket.Now it is upto him to encash the cheque.'

"If he can cash it, then he can spend it."

Donkey in the Well

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happens.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less from people but more from yourself.

You have two choices... smile and close this page, or pass this along to someone else to share the lesson...

Send me something !!!

Send me something ...My Love !!!!

Waiting for Wife to get Ready

Politics Explained

Son: "Daddy, I have to write a special report for school, but I don't know what Politics is."

Father: "Well, let's take our home as an example. I am the bread-winner, so let's call me Capitalism. Your Mum is the administrator of money, so we'll call her Government. We take care of your need, so let's call you The People. We'll call the maid the Working Class and your brother we can call The Future. Do you understand son?"

Son: "I'm not really sure, Dad. I'll have to think about it."

That night awakened by his brother's crying, the boy went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had seriously soiled his diaper, the boy went to his parents' room and found his mother sound asleep. He went to the maid's room, where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheeded by his father and the maid, so the boy returned to his room and went back to sleep. The next morning he reported to his father.

Son: "Dad, now I think I understand what Politics is."

Father: "Good son! Can you explain it to me in your own words?"

Son: "Well Dad, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, Government is sound asleep, the People are being completely ignored and the Future is full of Shit."

Think Before You Leave !!!

Dear Wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good man to you for seven years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today & that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home & didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You came home & ate in two minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps.

You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore...whatever the case is, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband

P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving to West Va., together! Have a great life alone!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Dear Ex-Husband:

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you & I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining &

griping. Too bad that doesn't work.

I did notice when you got a hair cut last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a girl!" but my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say anything nice. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER , because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50.00 from me that morning & your silk boxers were $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out.

So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess.

I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me So take care.

Signed: Rich As Hell, Free & Alone for the MOMENT!!!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but Carla, my sister, was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem.:)

Misconception of Teachers

Dont You Agree?

How Did You Die?

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.

"I froze to death," says the second.

"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"

"It's very uncomfortable at first", says the second man. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?"
"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.

"What do you mean?" asks the first man.

"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."

Dinner at Girlfriend's Place

A boy decided to have a dinner with his girlfriend parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.

Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.

At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"

The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head.

A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."